Release Me
by RonnieAndJackForever-Chloe
Summary: This is a Rack songfic, A/N explains. Anyway, it's set about a month after the week beginning 27/7/09. Nearly all events before and during this week and the next week involving Ronnie are included. Ronnie analyses her life in Walford. Stay or Go?


Release Me

Song/Fanfic By RonnieAndJackForever-Chloe

A/N – I may continue this into a fanfic at a later date, but for now I am concentrating on my first fanfic, Ronnie and Jack – The Love That Burns. So please check that one out and subscribe for author & story alert as I think I have an idea for this fanfic, it just might take a while to get going :)

**Release me , release my body.  
I know it's wrong, So why am I with you now.  
I say release me, Cause I'm not able to  
convince myself  
That I'm better off without you.**

Ronnie lay next to Jack in his bed, she knew it was now or never. But how could she leave this? This perfect love, this true love. Archie had killed Danielle and mortified her family, but never again would he return to haunt them, she would make sure of that. Her family. What did those words mean to her? Roxy, she betrayed me. Peggy, well she means well but it isn't the same, Archie. She could barely bring herself to whisper his name, and the image of him in her head sent shivers down her spine.

**Yeah, it's perfectly clear  
That love's not what you need  
I tell you I don't care  
But I don't want to  
Anything that you say  
I hear myself agree  
And I don't recognize  
What I've turned into,**

What was there left for her in the Square. Well there was one thing. Jack. Why am I so hopeless? Ice-Queen, unbreakable, she knew what everyone thought of her, everyone hated her. But the Ice-Queen always melts when she gazes into the eyes of true love. But true love brought it's peril. There was the whole baby thing. The leaving Walford. The return. The brief phase where both herself and Jack had fooled themselves into moving on, or attempting to. How could I have seen anything in Ryan? Ryan?!? Thank goodness Jack had made me see sense! If he hadn't shown her what Ryan really wanted her for, well, she didn't know where she'd be today!

Then there was Joel. His visit had really shaken her up. He came waltzing into the Square, claiming his love and his need to be with her. Ha! She'd seen through him in seconds. Yes, they'd talked in the cafe at first. Smiled in the street – well that was only to make Jack jealous, and it had worked better than she'd expected! She had fooled herself into befriending him until that fateful day. That conversation. The day she told him of his daughters death...

_Ronnie: Joel, there's something I need to tell you._

_Joel: Fire away!_

_Ronnie: It's...Amy died, Joel._

_Joel: Amy? Who's that?!?_

How could he of forgotten the most beautiful human being on the earth?!? The beautiful, naïve, caring Danielle. Ronnie had thought of her everyday since she'd first been cruelly taken from her. It had felt even worse the next time, but she still thought of her everyday. He'd forgotten his daughter! That was it! She wouldn't fool herself any longer. With one swift punch she sent Joel to the floor before whispering in his ear.

_Ronnie: Amy is the most important thing in my life. I hope you go to hell._

**I don't know why I want you so  
'Cause I don't need the heart break  
I don't know what addictive hold  
You have on me I can't shake  
No, I'm not in control  
So let me go**

She looked again at Jack, sleeping peacefully. She knew now that he didn't want one she wanted, at least, not right now. It wasn't right to keep stringing him along like this, he could be happy without her, she was sure.

There had been good days, happy days. Like the proposal in the Vic. Everyone had seen it, though. She knew now Jack hadn't meant it to be that way, and she forgave him. She always forgave him! He had slept with his ex-wife, with her sister, had a baby with her sister. Yet still, she took him back. She's tried to stay away from him. For days and weeks she'd ignored him, speaking to him when it was necessary and not if she didn't have to. She hadn't served him at the bar, the one time she had spoken to him willingly was when she shouted the odds at him at the club, over him taking Roxy to court. But even then he'd smiled and got it all planned out. But when Roxy kissed him at the Christening it was an entirely different matter. Clearly, Roxy wanted Jack. But Jack told her on countless occasions that he wanted nothing else but her. Nothing in the entire universe would console him if ever she left him.

**Release me  
Release my body  
I know it's wrong  
So why do I keep coming back  
I say release me  
'Cause I'm not able to  
Convince myself  
That I'm better off without you**

Let me go, Jack! She had thought of leaving him many times now, and on many occasions. But she couldn't forget him. She tried it on with other men, still couldn't forget him, or stop herself making comparisons between them and him. She tried to move away and start a new life, but she'd still found herself coming back! That was because of Archie though, he was clearly running rings round the Mitchells and they needed her help to stand up to him.

**I could sleep by myself  
I would burn me alive  
Find me somebody else  
But I don't want to  
Try to leave out the love  
That goes against the grain  
But I can rationalize it  
If I have to**

She could leave, find a new life again, and mean it this time. But what of all the happy memories, the sentimental value this place now held for her. Danielle had...had been here. She couldn't leave it now, she didn't think she's be able to. She wanted so badly for Jack and her to work, she needed to talk to him about it.

**I don't know why I want you so  
'Cause I don't need the heart break  
I don't know what addictive hold  
You have on me I can't shake  
No, I'm not in control  
So let me go**

Jack had a certain, hold on her. If it was true and there was such thing as soul mates, then they were probably it. They seemed to have a magnetized attraction to each other, no matter how far they went from each other they kept coming back.

**Release me  
Release my body  
I know it's wrong  
So why do I keep coming back  
I say release me  
'Cause I'm not able to  
Convince myself  
That I'm better off without you..**

**I'm not in control  
So let me go**

Jack, bless him. He'd tried so hard to console her, to help her anyway he could. She'd dismissed him every time. He'd even confessed his love for her at the wedding, and she'd dismissed it. He must've been heartbroken!

And then there was the airport! He'd confessed his love for her to the whole airport. That'd been embarrassing to say the least. But it must've taken real guts to do that. She'd run back into his arms and he'd held her while she cried. She didn't know how long they'd stood there, cocooned in each others arms. She never wanted to let go, but when she did Jack held tightly to her hand and she'd felt better.

Jack had that effect on her, a sort of calming effect. No matter how bad the situation, Jack would make it better.

And he was so romantic, so devoted. He'd sent her flowers, beautiful flowers, and made the most delicious picnic for her, that day in the club. She wanted nothing more than for him to be her husband.

But she had to leave now, if Jack didn't want what she wanted it couldn't work, could it?

**Release me  
Release my body  
I know it's wrong  
So why do I keep coming back  
I say release me  
'Cause I'm not able to  
Convince myself  
That I'm better off without you..**

Jack would be okay on his own! He would stop thinking about me eventually. He had a knack for making the best of a bad situation, didn't he?

_Ronnie: Jack, you know that time you and Max had a fight in the Vic, on Saint George's Day? The one where I screamed 'Jack' and suddenly you stopped fighting? What made you stop?_

_Jack: You. When you screamed Jack, I recognized your voice, I remembered how much I still loved you, so I stopped._

_Ronnie: Really?_

_Jack: Yeah. And you know what else? Outside, Max asked me why I wanted Roxy, I said...I said I didn't. He asked me what I was doing and I said. I love Ronnie, it's always been Ronnie. But if I don't have a chance with her, I had to try something._

She had to leave now.

**Release me  
Release my body  
I know it's wrong  
So why do I keep coming back  
I say release me  
'Cause I'm not able to  
Convince myself  
That I'm better off without you..**

No. I will stay, I can wait, with Jack, I can wait.

_Ronnie: Jack?_

_Jack: Yeah?_

_Ronnie: We need to talk, but first, promise me on thing._

_Jack: What's that then?_

_Ronnie: Stay with me forever, and stay with me always. Even if I leave, find me. Even if something comes between us, we sort it. Even if we die, stay together. Even if the world comes crashing down, stay together._

_Jack: I will stay with you forever and always._

_Ronnie and Jack: Together for always. Together forever._

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A/N Thanks for reading, please review it, it won't take long, and if your one of the first it's likely that I'll reply to you, personally! Please give advice and constructive criticism, it means the world. And if you don't have time, save this page and do it later, thank you! xxx


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